its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
