then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize