at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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