dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
