At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
