please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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