My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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