last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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