it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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