i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
