we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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