I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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