I wannas sexs uuuuu
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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