Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
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