I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
