Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
