i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
