But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Randomize