Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
