Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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