i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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