Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
