Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
