do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
