i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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