My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
