don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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