The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize