Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize