Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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