i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
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