We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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