Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
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