Whats the glycemic index on semen?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize