it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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