There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize
