Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
pray to the hookup gods
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize
