I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize