In the future we'll all be gay
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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