What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
