Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
