my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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