i don't plan on having that self control this summer
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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