Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
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How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
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