Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize