I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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