He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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