we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
they're like a gay fantastic four
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
