Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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