you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps