I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I would fuck him just for his dog
It all started with a game of naked twister.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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